My posts have mostly been sunshiney and positive, and I really am happy with my progress and achievements in regards to my band, exercise, and weight loss. It's everything else that I'm blah about. Can I just vent for a minute?
My mother in law moved into our driveway in late July. It was planned and expected. I had been looking forward to it. Now I wish she'd pack back up and leave. It feels like we have a troll out there. Lurking, watching, listening. I value my privacy and now feel like it's being invaded daily. She tries not to, I think, but she can't help it. She is a perpetual "damsel in distress", I hate it when she gives me that stupid doe eyed look and starts telling me what's wrong, acting like hubby or myself need to fix it for her. How did she make it the last 6 years while we were 1000's of mile apart? To top it off the kids haven't taken to her like I thought they would, one of the Twinkies even told her she couldn't come in the house yesterday and tried to kick her out. Oy. And the dog barks, in a protective way, every time she comes in.
The Girl (12 almost 13, 7th grade) is and has been a strong willed, hard headed person since the day she was born. She seems to be having a personality conflict with her Math/Science teacher this year. The teacher apparently has high standards for neatness and quality of work and The Girl is unable/unwilling to comply. She is chronically disorganized and messy despite my bet efforts to help her out. I know she needs to learn responsibility and consequences in the real world so I think it's time for me to start backing off a little and let her figure it out! Anyway, this has resulted in zero's for numerous assignments as teacher rips them up and throws them out if they are "unacceptable". Oh and giving her 1 out of 5 points on a Math quiz even though she got all 5 answers correct, because her hand written problem solving was messy. Supposedly she can redo them (assignments not quizzes) and turn them in again but The Girl refuses to do the work more than once. I'm trying to get an appointment to meet with the counselor and her teachers to sort this out but The Girl's opinion of this teacher will never change. She thinks she's a bitch, a bully, stuck up, snobby etc.It's going to be a miserable school year for all involved if I can't get her switched out of this class.
The Boy (9 almost 10, 4th grade) has been having melt downs over homework and any other little thing all week. Sadly this is not new for him. He has always been overly dramatic. Any injury or slight, perceived or real results in a crying, bellowing tantrum that could rival any toddler. Then there's the verbal assaults "You hate me." "I want to run away." "I hate you." "You don't like me." and on and on. He flings these around over stupid stuff like being told no to playing Wii before his homework is done. Or go take a bath. Or change your clothes. Attention seeking? Probably but we've tried singling him out for special trips/treats/attention in the past and he ended up making those attempts miserable for us. Nothing is ever quite what he wants or good enough. The daily battles really wear me down. This past week has been especially rough as Hubby has been out of town so I haven't had any back up.
And I've come down with some crud. It started as a dry tickle just under my voice box which got me started coughing a couple of days ago. Today I woke up and the soreness seems to be creeping up the back of my throat. My voice is croaky, I'm feeling tired, rundown, and cranky. Oh joy.
7 comments:
I'm sorry to hear you are having a rough time. I swear, if my MIL moved to my state - much less my neighborhood - you'd have to commit me. The woman is a menace.
I hope things get better for you. Hang in there.
Sounds to me like you could really use some TLC :(
I hope things get better for you at home.
Maybe you should leave the kids with your Mum and run away for a day or two. That way you get some much needed rest and they will either get along nicely or not without you and could solve more than one problem :) (Your mum might decide to leave on her own if she is left with the kids :P)
Oof! I'd be so frustrated with your daughter's teacher. I swear, being neat has NOTHING to do with whether or not she's learning math. I hope you can get her switched to a different class. I know my hackles (as both a mama and as a messy writer) would be up if I had to deal with a teacher like that.
ok... please vent away whenever you need to - I have similar issues and though you weren't asking I'm going to tell comment with some things that have helped a little (not a lot) here.
my older is a boy 12 in 7th grade and he's strong willed and has had issues with teachers from time to time - I have convinced him that he has to find the "key" to each teacher - almost outsmarting them (I've never ever said he is smarter than a teacher of course, but I've played to his ego) For instance if the key is neat work and showing every single step of his algebra (which it is this year too) well then - "Gosh, Ted, that's an easy one. You can write neatly if you put your mind to it and if that's the key to Mrs. Howard, then you need to give her what she wants to make her happy and then you win with better grades. I'm way simplifying the convo obviously but over time it has worked pretty well, if not without reminders with Teddy. He is also really disorganized - like seriously - and I sort of let him go and figure it out last year and it just didn't go well - I think he needs to learn this stuff on his own - but he's just not as ready as I know his brother will be when he's the same age, so now I push him again.
My younger one, a boy, will be 10 in about 6 weeks and is also in 4th grade and very prone to drama. I will say that it has begun this year to show signs of getting better. We had him in counseling for anxiety issues and maybe that's been why, but really, I think he's just getting older and old enough to begin to get it that husband and I are really going to make him do his homework every night - even if he throws a fit - and the fit just serves to get him no TV or sent to his room or whatever. I think he's finally maturing is what I'm saying so maybe it's the same for you son too and he'll start getting it too any day now. Last year and even the beginning of this year was awful, but it's better right now - so there's hope! (sorry this is so long) Feel free to email me if you'd like to talk about this or anything else!! Always nice to find people with the same age kids.
Can you lock all the doors and close the curtains-maybe even take the phone off the hook? It was funny when you said your MIL was in the driveway. I could see her sitting in a lawnchair staring at your house.
When my son was in Grade 7 his teacher was really OCD. You had to do things exactly like she said or as in your daughters case-she would blow up. He was a terrible writer but smart as all get out. We had to tolerate the bitch for the rest of the year but it makes me wonder why they pick on kids. My advice, take the torn up test to the principal and tell him in no uncertain terms that this was unacceptable behaviour on the part of the teacher. If your daughter got all the answers right, why would she have to do it again.
BTW, my son is 25 and still can't write worth $h!t. He also was easily distracted but did exceptionally well in University. I hope things work out for you. Getting the school to assist will be a good thing. That's what we pay them for. Good luck.
LOL Sandy Lee, she's living in a 26 ft camp trailer out there which in itself is creating a bunch of problems while we are trying to have an RV hook-up installed.
Nightmare! Being a mum is the hardest job in the world I swear...i agree with Sandy Lee, take the torn up assignment to a meeting with the principal, because I too feel this is unacceptable behaviour! So discouraging and negative for your daughter, not to mention humiliating in front of her peers. She shouldn't have to tolerate that kind of treatment. If it was only slightly unreasonable behaviour I would encourage her to use her smarts to make the teacher like her, but to me this is beyond that and needs to be tackled before your daughter totally turns of to learning. Good luck with it xx
Post a Comment