Are you picking up what I'm laying down?

Just a few things I may or may not have disclosed about myself; in no particular order...

I am a foodie. I love to cook and sometimes try new things. I am a picky eater so there are definite limits to what I'll try. I am always on the hunt for a recipe to twist, tweak, & call my own. I try to shop frugally. With a family of six and one income, how can I not? I love to shop consignment & thrift shops. On grocery shopping day I go to Safeway fairly early in the day and hope to find some great deal in the clearance meat section.

I am a homebody, most of the time I'd rather stay home than go out. I don't like crowds. I hate clothes shopping especially, but that's probably because I'm super short and fat so finding things that fit properly is near impossible. Unfamiliar things/places/routes kind of freak me out. I hate to be late. On more than one occasion I mapped out and drove to a business the night before an interview to check out the location and parking situation. I do enjoy an adventure though, I can do an impromptu road trip as long as we stay on well traveled roads. No, "Let's see where this dirt road takes us.", detours for me thanks! Too much risk I guess.

I am painfully shy at times. I hate making phone calls especially to strangers. I have to psych myself up to make Dr appointments and such. I think I may come off stuck up in social situations when it's really that I'm self conscious and am afraid I'll put my foot in my mouth. My brain to mouth filter is faulty and I say things most people would only think.

I rarely drink alcohol, a cocktail or two, maybe a beer but never wine. I've had the same bottle of vodka in my fridge for over 3 years! I don't smoke, tried cigs as a kid but didn't care for it.

I grew up with 3 brothers, one older and two younger. I found out in my early 20's that I also have an older half sister on my dad's side. I've had very little contact with her since then.

I have trust issues. I can't even really trust my alarm clock.

The man my mom married after my dad was a real tool. I still wish him ill for all that he did to me and put me through. It's been a while but I used to have dreams about telling him off in the foulest language possible.

I love my kids. Each of them is special in their own way and I try to acknowledge and encourage it every chance I get. Their childhood experiences have been vastly from my own and I intend to keep it that way.

I love my husband. We've been together through a hell of a lot of ups and downs in the last 16 years. Any one of those experiences could have broken a us up but we survived. He has never wavered or given my any reason to doubt him or his love for me. I am very excited about all the things we'll get to do together in the future as healthier, thinner people.

I am a SAHM these days but that wasn't always the case. I was the primary breadwinner for the first 10 years or so of our marriage, not by choice exactly but we went with it.

My best friend from junior high is battling cancer, it started out as cervical and is now in one of her lungs. It's one of those friendships where years can pass but we always fall right back in where we left off. She has a husband and two young daughters. My heart hurts when I think about the possibility of her not beating it.

So where am I going with all this? I don't know really. But there it is.